Dan gets his dream job

Since I have not written anything in about three weeks I figured every one has stopped checking on this blog. Which is fine now I write all about the job I have that pays my 50k and sends me on weekly business trips to the British Virgin Islands. The work is ok, but all my co-workers are twenty-something women who just sit around talking to me all day. Here is my typical work day.

8:00 am, Get to work, turn on my computer, check my e-mail, responds to e-mails.
8:15 am, Stephanie comes into my corner office and asks if I want to take a smoke break.
8:30 am, Come back to my corner office, boss comes in gives me either new project, promotion, raise, or box level tickets to tonight's baseball game.
9:00 am, Work interrupted by Tracy coming in asking me if I want any thing from Starbucks.
9:15 am, Lisa, my secretary, comes in to complain about how her man isn't treating her right, and she really wants a guy like me.
9:45 am, Tracy comes back with my latte and sits down in my corner office and drinks her iced Mochachino while telling me about either, ex-jerk-ass-boyfriends, stupid-ass-"romantic"-trips-for-mentioned-take-her-on, all--she-is-really-looking-for-is-guy-like-me.
10:30 am, After getting some serious work done bosses' secretary comes in near tears, she tells me that bosses' boss is about to fire boss because boss forgot to do X. I tell tearful secretary that its okay because I did X for boss, and I give her the file in which all research for X is in. Secretary looks Like she is about to kiss me, and I show her the door instead.
1:15 am, Boss comes in shaken. Says thanks, graciously received by me. Then he proceeds to tell my too much about his sins and the sins of his secretary and sins of his wife and the sins of his wife's pool cleaner.
12:00 pm, Bosses' Boss takes me out to a little French bistro and tells me that he is sick of my Boss and if he hasn't my bosses' brother my boss would be fired by now. Tells me all be promoted to better things behind bosses' back.
12:45 am, Still at French bistro, Bosses' boss no completely drunk from all Merlot over lunch. Starts telling my that he never did any thing nice for his children. I try to stop him from crying and telling me about such things. I fail and spend half an hour comforting poor bastard. Bill comes, $ 487.65.
1:00 pm, April comes in, asks if I like new short hair cut, asks if I got e-mail about the club for tonight, asks if I'm going to buy her dinner and drinks before we go.
2:00 pm, Lisa asks to leave early, says it will never happen again.
4:00 pm, Stephanie asks if I want an "after lunch smoke",
5:00 pm, Tracy come in asking if I'm going to be at for-mentioned club. Do I want to take her out to dinner and drinks before?
5:05 pm, Tracy, looking hurt, leaves my corner office. Before she shuts do I ask her if she wants to go to Vail this Saturday.
5:06 pm, Tracy shuts door to my corner office with a lovely smile on her face.
5:45 pm, Turn off my computer and leave work.

Dan's Picks

Dan's suggested reading of the week: Florence of Arabia by Christopher Buckley in this month's issue of The Atlantic, (also in the same issue is a rather interesting article on the press responses to the coming conclave and the future pope). It is not a short story, but a first chapter of a book of the same title, that is a satirical look at Saudi Arabia and the U.S. government's involvement with the corrupt royal family. Also, as the name suggests, it is a send up to T.E. Lawrence. Pick it up when your looking for something fast, funny, and witty to read.

Order in a World of Chaos

Here is an update on art-for-the-sake-of-order idea (the reason why I am writing about this is because it really interests me and ... Well come on, is there anything else to write about?). So, Mr. Johnson argues that man uses the arts (technical, practical, and fine) to make sense of the world around us. A world that is pure Chaos. What we need is order in our lives, and since we are the only beings that notice the chaos, or at least care about it, we try to fix it with out arts. Further, we imitate the irrational things, namely nature, and in doing so make it rational. The two best examples of this are the cave paintings in France and Spain, and the Celtic knotted animals created by the Irish monks. In both cases men are taking the irrational and creating a ordered whole out of it. In fact, the Celtic knots are probably the best examples of real art. They take the so-complex-it-is-unknowable-to-us and represent that complexity and unknowable with their tangles and cris-crosses. When you look at those knotted animals eating each other you are looking at art that is equal to or better than anything the great Dutch (realist) masters created. In fact the master craftsmen did something that is all but impossible to replicate.

On another note, thinking about art really makes you discontent. I want to be rich now. I want want to be a Cossimo De Medici type, with all the best art in my personal possession. Also looking at art requires a lot of travel, and I don't mean to museums. I hate museums; with the five thousand people standing around a Renoir pretending their cultured because they are looking at the impressionists paintings and skipping the David, Friedrich, and Courrot in the next room. No travel means going to the cathedrals and little village churches, or wandering around east Turkey finding the seventeen hundred year old Amenian Church, or finding spectacular ruins of Magna Grace in Sicily. I need to stop thinking about this, and then I need to get off this Campus, then I need to make a lot of money.